Senior Momentum by Zoe Tummillo - October 2019
September’s Song is that fleeting melody we remember, like a lover’s kiss on an old Autumn evening when you felt the first chilly breeze; and I think October is here! The Harvest is nearing an end, and a hint of hot, spiced coffee drifts from the person you just passed on the sidewalk. We are guardedly thankful that we are almost past the threat of wildfire. And, I am hoping that something significant and positive will erase the ugly, divisive political taint that threatens Autumn’s beauty and its promise of Winter’s cool head. Oh, well, we all know a cock-eyed optimist or two... It’s my destiny (it seems) to float between those two dangers: Anger and Cock-eyed Optimism! All it takes, sometimes, is a conversation with my son who devours biographies of past presidents. He points out that: “... our country has had these challenges before, Mom – and worse! The Jackson situation, for instance!” So, temporarily, I slip back to optimism. I like it there, but false highs are tricky – regardless of the context.
Autumn -- and I do not miss the heavy smoke in the air, or the glow of flames on a ridge threatening to descend and destroy. Of course, there’s the ever-present “go-bag” in my CRV, and a few essentials stacked just inside the door, ready to jump and run. Autumn brings wonderful memories! Anyone from New England, and those beautiful areas in the Northeast, can remember how Autumn became a breathtaking tapestry of color across the landscape! Our Sugar Maples then, in their fall colors could take your breath away! The seasonal change used to be quite clear – it didn’t rage and dribble and stumble across the days, obliterating distinctions... We’d wake up one morning and the crisp in the air told us Summer’s over, Autumn’s prelude is here, time to get the winter coats and ear muffs ready! And it was the same when the air changed one morning in the Spring, and you knew winter was over.
Once in awhile there would be a lovely blend of late Summer and early Autumn that we called Indian Summer, as if Summer didn’t want to let go, and Autumn would give a little delay bonus! Our California seasonal changes were a little subtler – but you could still tell when Nature’s Roadies had kicked in and were changing the scene!
Nostalgia is that funny, warm feeling that can wash over you when something in the now reminds you of something sweet in the past! Sometimes that emotion can immerse you in a longing for how it was then, but just isn’t anymore; not even close. Of course, yesterdays don’t come back! There’s an uneasy foreboding in the air that seems to warn that some beautiful transitions are not just gone for a season, but are gone forever. It’s as if Nostalgia itself is being redefined into wishful thinking...then, a creeping sense of foreboding. What’s going on? How did we get so careless? Do we hear our children crying? Can we change it all in time?
I was thinking about those symbols that used to characterize weather in the fairy tales, when we were children – Wind was that billowy, white image with cheeks puffed out, lips pursed and blowing a wild gale! Sunshine was that bright orange disc, a circumference of golden spikes radiating light and a big smile! There was one for Lightning and Raging Thunder, one for Rain and the formidable Snow Queen with icicles in her hair!
How strange to see those sweet images morph into a swirling confusion, crashing into each other – direction, seasons, sequence and integrity lost and floundering! October’s here! (At least, I think it is.)
